Some people are just BORN Idiots

Ahhhhhh, taking your kids to a restaurant and trying to eat a good meal. If you have any children under the age of 5 you know the experience will be anything but enjoyable for you - if you're the mama. Somebody's gonna be bitching the nuggets are too hot, another's gonna be pulling a Houdini trying to get out of the germ ridden high chair. And you know the waitress isn't gonna go the extra mile. She sees you and your hot mess brood and she thinks, "shitty tip and nasty ass clean up after the dirts leave."

I really believe one of the best days of my life will be when I can go to a restaurant with my family (nothing fancy either) and really savor every bite of my quesadilla. Nobody will need anything. They'll cut their own food. Leap up and clean the chocolate milk they managed to dump on the table. The waitress will set a Diet Coke caraffe next to my entree. The conversation will be interesting. None of this, "what is a racist, mom?" or "why do women feed their babies with bottles and their bodies?"

I was on my way out of the grocery store, cruising along out of the parking lot, when I see a 7 or 8 year old sitting on the curb outside of Boston Market. The scene resembled what people do with their dogs outside of DQ. You know, how they lasso them to a big piece of cement and then go in to inhale a blizzard or peanut buster parfait.

And the cement post this kid was sittin up against was super close to traffic. In fact, if he kept his knees straight and extended his legs, a car would run them over.

This situation really struck me. He wasn't selling any M & Ms, either. The kid even looked sad. So, I rolled down my window and asked the boy, "Honey are you okay?"

Young boy: barely looked up and said softly, "yeah, i'm just sitting here."

Janko: "Honey, are you by yourself? Do you need help?"

Young boy's big bad ass brother: (appears out of the corner) "No, lady, we're fine."

Janko: "Okay, but where is your mom?" (at this point, Andrew has the window down and is asking them where they go to school, what grade they're in, and if they are on Safety Patrol.

Boys: "Our Mom is inside finishing up her chicken pot pie. She told us it was a nice day outside and we should sit out here and wait for her."

Janko: (thinking, you have GOT to be kidding me. some lazy ass is suckin down her meal and she doesn't want her kids around her. talk about a dipshit.) "Okay, well be super careful cause the traffic is kind of crazy around here."

Boys: (give no reply except to get closer to the back of the car where Andrew's window is still down and say, "Dude, that's a sweet shirt you're wearing. Did you see the last episode of the Clone Wars last Friday?"

Now it's a full blown conversation with Andrew and lawrd knows he thinks he hit the jackpot. I start to slowly pull away and Andrew is still carrying on.

As we're driving home Andrew says, "See, Mom, first you thought it was a bad decision for their Mom to have them sit outside. I know you were thinking in your head, 'POOR CHOICE.'" I could just tell. But really, it wasn't a bad idea cause they made a new friend with me. If they were inside, we never woulda met. Pretty incredible how things work out sometimes, eh Mom? I bet you could call that a miracle even."