"My stomach really hurts and I

think I need some medicine. You know how you have that feeling that you just want to throw up? I feel that feeling, now." (Andrew)

Janko: (thinking) Awww hells no. You've got a birthday party in 14 hours and you and i both need you to attend this party. you need to suck up that shitty feeling and get on with it.

Andrew: "Mom, you may want to drive faster to get home. Especially since you just vaccuumed out your car yesterday. I feel like something is gonna happen."

Janko: THROWS ON HAZARDS ASAP. Kicks up speed by 15 immediately.

Andrew: "Do you know what time Duke is playing Butler? I betcha Duke's gonna route little Butler, Mom. They won't know what hit 'em. Basketball is so fascintaing."

Janko: Oh, I see this bullhonkey a mile away. This little dirt wants to stay up so he plays the barf card. And I sure as hell know Toad wont be having any of this.

Janko: "Andrew, when we pull in the driveway, you hop out and go up to bed. You need to sleep if you feel so bad."

Andrew: "But my head is really banging and I only get relief when I am sitting straight up on the couch."

Toad enters picture and shoots me a bullhonkey look.

I tell Andrew he can watch TEN MINUTES of this riDICKulous game and then he weasels his way into my bed. That way if he vomits, it can ruin my bed and carpet. And the extra bonus is that I'll be IN the bed with him and am bound to get some type of residual effect.

15 minutes later, as Andrew is rolling back in forth in our bed moaning, Toad walks up with the laptop oblivious to what is actually happening. He says, "You wanna use the computer for anything?"

I smile and so no thanks, but am thinking - YOU have got to be kiding me. I am in bed with our 7 year old who's gonna blow it out any minute and you wanna throw the laptop in the mix? Good thing I got suckered into buying that damn "tuxedo service warranty plan" at besy buy for this thing. but i betcha this situation would never be covered.

So, here I am. 2:29AM. Booted out of my bed by a snoring diagonal sleeping 7 year old. Come downstairs to jump on the computer and get blog bitch back in order and Toad's sawwing 2 by 4's on the couch with the 3rd repeat of ESON sportscenter blowing up the tv screen.

life is grand.